Cultural IQ

A Black Man Insults a White Woman On A Bus? What Should We Do?

A white colleague recently shared that she stopped riding the bus in Philadelphia after a Black rider turned around  and began ranting: “I don't like white women.”  He was looking directly into her eyes. 

Responding to racial prejudice never is easy.  I greatly admired my colleague's thoughtful reaction: As the Black man was insulting her, she was thinking to herself:  "Ok, so you don’t like white women. Then what color do you want me to be?”

She clearly understood that she was not the problem. I wish  more  of  us  felt  the  same  way.

If this conversation is making you uncomfortable, that's OK. We have not yet reached a place in America's emerging community of inclusion and belonging where everyone's pain gets discussed and everyone's wounds are healed.

When we read or view news reports on racial discrimination, most often we hear about the mistreatment of minority groups.

Only in Donald Trump's America do we regularly hear about how white Americans also can get the short end of the stick. Those complaints often are dismissed because the speakers are viewed as racist and, therefore, incapable of separating fact from fiction.

Let's be clear.  I’m not suggesting that European  Americans need societal protection because lots of people are being mean to them. 

I'm suggesting that everyone - on occasion -  encounters prejudice, perhaps its because of their body shape, neighborhood, or the fact they never went to college.

Prejudice stings no matter who we are yet some of us are not getting an opportunity to speak our truth, or have that truth acknowledged publicly.

So how should an equitable society respond when a white woman is taunted by a black man on a bus? I asked that question on Facebook and not one person commented or responded. I get it: I was afraid to post this story. I knew it wouldn't get any likes. 

It takes real courage to seek justice for every American, and not just for the people we happen to love or care about.

Our community must be able to take a stand and proclaim: "We acknowledge your pain. We regret that you were insulted. We will do better."

Somebody on that bus could have walked over and sat beside my colleague. We must all play the role of ally from time to time. 

 

 

As Americans flock to see the film Civil War, anguish and silence fill the air

After watching 'Civil War' in Philadelphia yesterday, I was struck by the eerie silence and anguish on the faces of the movie goers. It was a somber moment.

The film's cautionary message was clear: a civil war is made up of many isolated battles, and Americans, whether in uniform or not, will struggle to maintain their humanity. 

The ugliest battles took place off the battlefield, not over values or principles, but in combat solely designed to determine a community's winners and losers. 

 The racial fault lines were not a part of the plot as soldiers appeared united in a shared desire to destroy and kill. 

This is an unsettling movie with an uncomfortable message: Neither extremists nor their guns can save our Republic and protect our democracy.

If we begin to hold conversations that are civil and painfully honest, it will give us a fighting chance.

US Military Utilizes New Type of Strength

 

What does the US Army expect of its 21st-century  troops? Cultural literacy, a set of new skills and abilities outlined below.

Here's the million-dollar question: If the Army expects enlisting soldiers to be culturally competent, should colleges and universities expect the same from their graduates?

 

 

US Army Definition of Culturally Literate Soldiers :

-Understand that culture affects their behavior and beliefs and the behavior and beliefs of others.

-Are aware of specific cultural beliefs, values, and sensibilities that might affect the way they and others think or behave.

-Appreciate and accept diverse beliefs, appearances, and lifestyles.

-Are aware that historical knowledge is constructed and, therefore, shaped by personal, political, and social forces.

-Know the history of mainstream and nonmainstream American cultures and understand how these histories affect current society.

-Can understand the perspective of nonmainstream groups when learning about historical events.

-Know about major historical events of other nations and understand how such events affect behaviors, beliefs, and relationships with others.

-Are aware of the similarities among groups of different cultural backgrounds and accept differences between them.

-Understand the dangers of stereotyping, ethnocentrisms, and other biases and are aware of and sensitive to issues of racism and prejudice.

-Are bilingual, multilingual, or working toward language proficiency.

-Can communicate, interact, and work positively with individuals from other cultural groups.

-Use technology to communicate with individuals and access resources from other cultures.

-Are familiar with changing cultural norms of technology (such as instant messaging, virtual workspaces, E-mail, and so on), and can interact successfully in such environments.

 

 

Life's Little Diversity Manual: How to Get Where We Need to Go

  

 

1) Diversity is much like a brand-new car. Navigating diversity without understanding its nuances can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, or even accidents.  You’re the driver, so it's crucial to learn how to navigate effectively. As with driving, practice and understanding make perfect as we embark on our journey towards a more diverse and inclusive society.

2) Contrary to popular reports, diversity is not dead or dying. Instead, it is evolving, bringing with it a wealth of opportunities and experiences. We must reassure those not ready for a trade-in that good things are in store for them and that we will watch out for their interests. They have good reason to feel that they are getting left behind.

3) Diversity breakdowns occur in all communities. Race, religion, and gender often steal the spotlight, but they by no means are responsible for all our problems. We are a nation of diverse cultures stitched into a colorful community. We’ve got our cat lovers and dog people (pet diversity.) Bicyclists and walkers (lifestyle diversity.) Republicans and Democrats (political diversity.) Then, there’s race, religion, gender, age, etc. Any time groups organize to advance their interests and compete for stuff, diversity-related problems will arise.

3) The safest motorists are also defensive drivers. They know how to share the road with newcomers, steer around the potholes of poor communication, and avoid the barriers of ignorance.  They slow down whenever they encounter dangerous driving conditions, such as road rage, and take shelter during the inevitable storms of doubt and confusion. They dazzle us with their uncanny ability to predict what other motorists will do and say and how they will respond to current conditions.

4) All of us have biases, so let’s stop pretending the other guy is flawed, but we have 20-20 vision. The goal is to identify and manage biases so that they don’t impair our ability to make mutually beneficial decisions.  If you can’t identify your biases, ask a friend or family to list them for you.. Chances are your friend is well aware of them. Biases create blind spots, which make it more challenging to drive, but together, we can navigate them.

5) We are all fellow travelers on a road that’s under construction. So expect delays and be on the watch for unexpected road hazards. Keep a safe distance from other motorists until you gain skill and experience.

6) Don’t try to teach someone else to drive if you’ve had a lot of accidents.

7) Road rage doesn’t make the roads safer. Angry drivers are not the solution; they are a big part of the problem.

8) Keep handy two of the most frequently used words in the language of inclusion: Ouch and Oops. “Ouch, that hurt. Why did you say that?” “Oops. I goofed.” Keep these words with you at all times. They are accommodating following a cultural collision. Encouraging open communication is a powerful tool in promoting understanding and inclusion.

9) Be willing to get outside of your comfort zone. If you travel the same route every day, you will meet the same people and pass the same landscape. People who travel alternate paths have better options and more ways to get where they want.

10) Don’t think your car is better than mine. A fast sports car and an old beater can both take us where we must go. This is not a competition. The objective is not to arrive first or look the best but to ensure we leave no motorist behind.

12) After a cultural mishap or collision occurs, refrain from gawking and rubbernecking. Mind your own business. Don’t sit on the side of the road and fan the flames after a cultural collision. It slows traffic and increases the risk of additional accidents.

13) Have some fun along the way. Pull off to the side now and then to appreciate the breathtaking mosaic of American life. Stop at the rest stops to talk with other drivers. Change the stations on your car radio.

 

 

 

Why People Hate - And What To Do About It

Dear Cultural Coach: Whenever I read about hate groups or see their leaders on TV, it makes me angry. The actions of these few often give their neighbors, their communities, and even their families a lousy reputation. Why do people hate? What can we do to eliminate it? - Hate Not

Dear Hate Not: Hate is a spectacle we should confront, but most of us prefer to ignore it until our particular group is under attack. I'm as guilty as anyone. I shun associations with individuals, groups, and organizations that promote hatred whenever possible. 

In life, people tend to judge us based on the company we keep. My circle of friends indicates to others whether I am truly tolerant of differences, skilled at managing conflict, optimistic, considerate, and well-informed. So, although I am willing to listen to people with hate-filled biases and prejudices and hear their stories, I make it clear to them that I do not consider their opinions to be my truth.

Now, let's get right to your question. Why do people hate? Since the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks, that question has been on the mind of a lot of folks, including President George Bush, who asked in a passionate speech to Congress shortly afterward, ``Why do they hate us?'

Since everyone has a cultural filter, we might turn to science for answers. Over the past 10 years, neuroscientists studying the brain have probed the biology of hate. Rush W. Dozier, a Harvard-educated journalist and science writer, provides a glimpse into how hate arises and affects human behavior in his book, ``Why We Hate: Understanding, Curbing and Eliminating Hate in Ourselves and Our World' (Contemporary Books).

``Hate is a primitive emotion that marks for attack or avoidance those things that we perceive as a threat to our survival or reproduction, which are the prime directives of evolution,' Rush writes.

In other words, when we hate other people or groups, fear drives us.

``The reaction is automatic and stereotyped,' Rush contends. ``Similarly, someone filled with racial or ethnic hatred experiences immediate, irrational hostility whenever he or she encounters any member of the hated class - an Arab or Jew, Serb or Croat, black or white - irrespective of that particular individual's unique qualities or beliefs.'

Although this is not surprising, Rush argues that hate is a product of the brain's limbic system, which is programmed to carry out evolutionary imperatives of survival and reproduction.

So, if hate is wired into us, how do we eliminate it? Rush offers several strategies for consideration:

First, we must learn to identify any source of anger, pain, or threat with as much specificity and detail as possible. Avoid generalizations.

Second, when dealing with groups with little sympathy, develop an ``us-us' orientation instead of an ``us-them approach. Avoid language that fosters conflict and divisions. Find common ground by identifying what both communities have in common. When all else fails, we can always agree to disagree.